REVISITING THE PARK | Heck, no, techno!

Believe it or not, we cave dwellers of early Madison Park hungered for new technology way back when. 

Buzz and Doug’s hobby shop, which befitted our creative inclinations, was located one block west of Broadway on Pike Street. Whether it was a stick model plane or an HO-scale train set that we saved for, Buzz and Doug’s was the place to get it. 

I was one of the first to send away for the signet ring of one of our favorite radio station heroes. It was a challenge to decipher the coded message each day. “Mind your parents!” was one message that did not leave us in awe. We got enough of that at home!

The 44-caliber cap gun that fired caps as fast as you could pull the trigger was one of the top techie toys. The caps were difficult to come by during World War II, but when word got out that the dime store in the Park had stock, we ran to buy a box — six rolls for 5 cents! 

Darting amongst the shoppers on the Ave, firing at will, we yelled, “Got ya! You’re dead!” People laughed or at least smiled. 

During those olden days, we learned cursive writing and perfected the art of printing and penmanship on double-spaced paper. If you were good at it, you got kudos in the form of A’s; if you were not so good, you were probably left-handed, forced to be a righty. 

Keeping communications open

Most homes had a rotary phone in the ‘40s, but it was usually with a party line to save money. 

It was most important to learn phone etiquette: Lift the phone from the receiver, listen for a dial tone or for anyone speaking. If there were voices, you quickly hung up. 

Phone numbers were unique (Capital2279 was mine, and a schoolmate who lived on 33rd Avenue was East2643).

The phone opened up a whole new world. The Saturday matinee required several phone calls to synchronize the departure on the No. 11 bus to town. It was important to carry a nickel in case we had to use the public phone booth. The problem was the phone was just out of reach for us and we had to ask an adult to dial. 

Oh, the telephone pranks! Call the drugstore and ask, “Do you have Prince Albert in a 1-pound can?” Answer: “Yes we do!” “Well, let him out — it’s stuffy in there!” and we’d hang up laughing hysterically. 

In 1957, I was responsible for wiring all the companies with twin lead used in the headquarters switchboard that was connected to enormous standby batteries. The wiring production and batteries filled a 5-ton truck. Today, all that information and gadgetry would fit in a pocket. 

We answered calls by saying, “Cadet operator,” then plugged cables into the proper sockets as seen in old movies. 

In the ‘60s, I had a phone with a 20-foot line that could reach clear into the bathroom. One night, while I was in the shower, the phone on the vanity rang. I reached for it, and before I could say hello, the base fell in the toilet. 

Luckily, the water was clean, but reluctantly I pulled it out and let it dry. 

The phone still worked, but the dial on the base would not return after rotating. It had to be done manually, and it was fun to watch people dial it after that. 

Many years later, a wireless phone came out that was a little smaller than the walkie-talkies used in the Army, but not much. 

I recall meeting for drinks with friends who brought their cumbersome devices and laid them on the table or nearby — proud as could be to have the latest in communications. 

If one rang, everyone reached for their phone like in the westerns, where cowpokes grabbed their guns. 

Karen, my wife, recently went to Italy with her childhood girlfriend. They FaceTimed me from a restaurant on a canal, drinking wine and having way too much fun, with a gondola in the background — all this Ma Bell could not do!

No more simple ‘Hello’

A phone is hoisted — “Hello?” It’s an easy enough routine, the other person answering on the other end with the same, “Hello!” How difficult can this be? 

There’s always something new to learn on a smartphone, like turning it off, down or silent. Miss one step and you’ve “butt-dialed” someone at 2:45 a.m. 

In our household, these are common refrains, “Where’s my glasses?” “Where are my keys” and “Where’s my phone? Call my phone!” 

In the ‘60s all you had to do was pull on the 20-foot line to find the phone. 

In 1948, no one said, “Where’s the phone? How can I lose the phone I just had in my hand?!” 

So we’ve all become phone-savvy. What’s next, an implant? 

It would be a low-voltage pass to stimulate a portion of the brain that’ll categorize the importance, and then, with one slight eye movement, make a call by brain impulse, which will be easily read by the other party without interrupting a conversation — all while making dinner and having a cocktail. 

Love this era!

RICHARD CARL LEHMAN is a longtime Madison Park resident. To comment on this column, write to MPTimes@nwlink.com.